🔺 r/gradadmissionsualmondbabka·55 days ago
Had a psychotic episode in the fall, accepted 2 grad offers, and it was discovered 6 weeks before classes start. My career is ruined and I am a horrible person
The title is self-explanatory. To make matters worse I am in a small subfield, and I know people talk. I ALSO got waitlisted at an overseas school, and when I informed them about my admission to one of the accepted schools, they were so happy telling me they have good friends and colleagues there. I suffer from a condition that causes prolonged psychosis, and have only had 2 episodes in my life. Unfortunately this latest episode was at its worst shortly before the national deadline which both muddied my decision-making and delayed it so that I had very little time to do so before April 15. I then experienced such extreme rumination about these schools and whether I'd be able to get my interventional treatment at a lower cost in which state. Ultimately I don't even know why this choice was made. I ended up deciding on one school the other day because of med reasons. It is a terminal master's, and I will have to re-apply to PhD programs in 2 years. But I was warned that my career could be tarnished. The ultimate goal is a PhD program and I know that people will talk, and say that I did a wildly unethical thing (which it is). This never would have happened under normal circumstances b…